I’m in a funk. Down in the depths on the ninetieth floor, to quote an old standard. What’s wrong? Nothing, exactly. Just a lot of old junk surfacing and needing acknowledgment. My poor boyfriend! (I think I’ll call him Descartes on this blog) I’m snarky and angry and easily ticked off. But I’m learning not to shy away from these feelings, because they just can’t continue to be pushed down any longer; I need to feel, express, and release them finally. It ain’t fun, but it’s real. Eckhart Tolle says that these feelings are the pain-body taking over and feeding on my misery, and that conscious observation will start to take its power away. Robert Ibrahim Jaffe, MD said in one of his talks that expressing feelings is crucial to regaining health and freeing the heart to be more loving. Hm. Have to see what works best for me now.

Descartes is a very creative cook (and an all-around very cool guy). He can take pretty much any combination of ingredients from the fridge and cupboard and make a great meal. For this I am grateful, and I may share some of his cool non-recipes here.

The bright spot in my day: I’m currently nurturing my first batch of sourdough starter. I think this is the coolest thing – harvesting bacteria and yeast in my own house to make something delicious. How weird is that??? Whoever thought of such a thing? But I’m hoping to have a big bowl of bacteria soup by the end of the week, with which to make some delicious bread. I think I’ll bring a loaf to my dear friend Pixie who we’re visiting this weekend. I know a good dose of bread and Pix will cure any funk I’m in. I’ll post the results of my starter later in the week.

What lifts you up when you’re down in the dumps?